Almost done....

I have to make this count. I have to reach the finish line so I can be on my way. I have to ensure my victory! STOP BEING SO LAZY!!! ARRGGGHHH!!!! `~CheckedOut!

Sucks...

Damn. I have to work on Thanksgiving Day and its a closing shift too. Dang it. Well, at least I get paid time and a half for it. Maybe its not so bad knowing that. I'll make up for it. I'll do my best to make up for it. ... sigh `~CheckedOut!

Feeling very off

I'm not feeling very great today. Everything feels so down and blue that it just doesn't seem right.

Maybe its because I have not been very happy or even content with what I am doing. I'm not sure anymore... I feel really lonely and not motivated to do anything. The day just seem really slow and not entertaining.

Not really enjoying anything at the moment. Everything just feels out of place.

`~CheckedOut!

Addicted to Tetris

There is a game in Facebook where you can play against other people from Facebook and it is addicting.

I might even be late for work because of it. Haha!

Enjoying myself! :)

`~CheckedOut!

Realization

Even though we have been together for over 6 years... there is always that uncertainty when things change and you are not informed or know anything about. That feeling sometimes gets really scary and you do not know what to do but hope for the best.

Even though there is still those uncertainties and doubts in the air... the love and trust of the two will always clear the thing that poses as an obstacle between the two.

We just have to talk it out and just really take the time to understand and listen. It is better and it will be for the better whether it seems dark.

Trust and Love.

`~CheckedOut!

Day One > Trip

After 12 hours of driving (alternating between my dad and I), we reached the city of New Jersey and checked in and everything.

Driving for a total of 6 hours is just a killer. We left home around 3-3:30AM and arrived to our destination at around 3pm-ish; that is already including the stop overs :P I seriously can understand all the people who drive for like the longest time... I really feel for you.

When we arrived, we checked in and rested for a bit in the hotel... it was a really really great rest if I do say so myself.

We just came back from walking through Liberty Park and visiting New Jersey's Outlet Mall. The walk through Liberty Park was really great! The weather was wonderful and the smell of the sea is just delightful. The visit to the mall on the other hand is just a big bummer. It was not even ever delightful; in short, IT SUCKED SO BAD! I do not think it is worth being called an outlet mall but what the hey! I did not buy anything so its all good. On the other hand... I did spend $13.08 for my dinner; NOT A GOOD IDEA but the food was not bad. I got a chicken steakhouse sandwich and it was really good. I got everything LARGE and OMGSH I almost died.

I have some pictures here but I will probably post some of them up on Facebook.

I should get some shut eye... driving for this long and still walking awake really took its toll on me. Not to mention that we left right after I finished worked during Sunday.

Sleep time! Tomorrow is another day of sweetness! :D Laters!

`~CheckedOut!

Happy 6th Year Anniversary

Even after 6 years of being together, I love you more and more everyday.

I have learned a lot about you but there is always room to learn more about you.

Thank you for being with me by my side throughout.

I cannot explain how much you mean to me and I love you no matter what!

We have been there through thick and thin and everything!

I love you so much Graham!

`~CheckedOut!

Rant

I just hate it when shit decides to fuck up plans and everything.

Fuck you and whatever fucking hell you belong to! I hope you and whatever it is with you fucking die in a metaphorical manner but at the same time literally manner.

I hate you in every fucking manner possible! I hope you eat shit and die because of it!

'~CheckedOut!

Another All nighter

Looks like I am gonna pull one of my all nighters again. Hahaha!!! It is not even the end of the year yet and I already in summer mode. Pretty bad but whatever, its more fun this way! :P

The things that amuse me! Haha! I love myself for that! xD

`~CheckedOut!

FUCK TODAY

THIS WHOLE FUCKING DAY HAS BEEN A PISS OFF FROM DRIVING INTERACTIONS UP TO HOLDING KEYS! WHAT OTHER THINGS ARE GOING TO GO WRONG! JUST FUCKING FINISH THE DAY ALREADY AND STOP FUCKING PISS ME OFF!

GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME! FUCK TODAY! FUCK OFF YOU WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU ARE!

'~FUCKINGCHECKEDOUT!

Poof

I feel like I am treading water almost about to drown.

Yupp... that is just about right.

`~CheckedOut!

Sendai, Japan : Update

I have heard word from my cousins that they are all safe and OK.

I am really glad and relieved and happy to hear that my family is safe after enduring this disaster that is still having its affect in Japan.

I pray and hope that for the other people who are searching for loved ones will have a positive outcome in their side.

My thoughts and prayers go out to everyone there in Japan.

`~CheckedOut!

Sendai, Japan

I am praying for the safety of my relatives Tita Annie, Uncle Nori, Chieri, Mai and Noa in Japan.

I am praying hard for their safety and for all the people in Japan as well.

If you can, please pray for everyone's safety.

Thank you.

`~CheckedOut!

That's a First

Today has been the most shitty day so far. I have not been feeling well thus making me very lethargic and weak to do anything that requires physical strength and mental strength.

My head constantly hurts that sometimes even turning my head will cause it it ache. My nose is blocked to the max so when I sleep, I have to breathe through my mouth which makes it dry thus waking me up constantly in the middle of the night so I could do something about it. This has been happening since the beginning of March.

On top of that, today I ate something really bad to which I had to regurgitate out during class time and that was not a pretty site. I am still recovering and I am not getting any better but I have to get better or else I will not be able to finish anything.

Geez man... the only time that I do not need to get all these things happening to me just so happens to choose the time where everything is compressed into one. Thank you so much for the great timing you have. Really... you make everything so much better!

`~CheckedOut!

Haha!

I am secretly and silently exploding!

KAAAAAA-POOOOSSSSHHHHHH!!!!!!

x)

`~Checkedout!

HOLY CHEESE!!!

Time goes by soooooo fast.... I did not even realize that it is already MARCH!!!

WoooooooooooooooooooooooooooW!!!!!

`~CheckedOut!

My Motivation

I have concluded that my own self-motivation is as of a snail.

Very motivated to push on forward to achieve the result but is just very slow in nature.

Yupp, I think that sounds dead on!

Haha! xD

'~CheckedOut!

Wow...

Sometimes I just cannot believe what I can pull out of my ass when I am under the clock.

This morning, I just finished a research essay in less than 6 hours. I ended up writing 9 pages... well, 10 pages if you in could the bibliography page and as well as finishing a summary sheet that needed to be handed in with an extra 39 copies.

I know I should not be doing that but circumstances are needed to be tended too. It is just mind blowing that I can do that but I know it cannot always be like this. Haha!

!! Learn Your Lesson Girl !!

`~CheckedOut!

.. * ^-^ * ..

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

The things I do for love...

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

`~CheckedOut!

Dear bottom teeth,

Please succumb to the force of the braces just as the top teeth has done. If you could just quicken your movements to get you in a position that is straight, it will make your life, as well as mine, way easier to cope with. I am doing whatever it takes to cooperate with you and I have already contacted outside help to aid with our current situation.

It has been already 3 years and I really think it is time for the braces and you, bottom teeth, to part your ways. I am sorry if you have established a relationship or something but I am not delighted with the situation whatsoever. In short, I need you both to break up as soon as the job is done.

Thank you for understanding.

Sincerely,
Jaesel

PS - if you noticed, I am getting irritated with my braces.. LoL :P

'~CheckedOut!

Snow Day!

Thank you Mother Nature for granting me the wish that I asked for... well, sort of commanded for... in a nice way. :D

Now I can sleep and do things that I feel is right for me.

I even have a snowed in survival kit handy just in case anything happens. I am prepared for the worse! All my extra clothes, blankets, food, paper & pen activities and spoons are in place and all the other things that are needed as well! Hahaha!

Yippie! I am already feeling happy and now... back to bed.

FYI - For the first time ever, I am experiencing a snow day! What do you do during a Snow Day anyways? O_o...

`~CheckedOut!

Dear February,

You have unexpected leaped into my time without notice.

Please tell me that you will be better to me than January has been. My January is not as bad as I think it has been (or I could be lying to myself) but I do hope that February will be a better month.

I will appreciate it very much if you could help me out.

Sincerely yours,
Jaesel

PS - Please tell Mother Nature to HAIL THE SNOW!!!! I do need the sleep in and time for myself. Please and thank you. I love you! :)

NTS - I love this song! :D

`~CheckedOut!

** grumble **

That is the sound that my tummy is making at the moment.

I left my amazing strawberry toast on the table at home. :'(

It will be OK, tummy. I will find something that will stop your grumblingness soon.

*~CheckedOut!

You know what...

I have never been so upset in the dead of night with my brother.

For so long I have been giving up my time to either pick you up or drop you off to places that are out of my way (whether I offered it or asked if you needed it) just because you are my family and the only time (and I mean THE ONLY TIME) where I asked for you to just pick me up after school at the GO Station in Square One during this blistering cold of the weather, you could not do it because you have someone who is waiting for you who you are going to hang out with and go out on a "date" or what ever the fuck you left me for so I had to bus home. The point that I am getting at is not because I had to bus home by myself... its not that at all.

I always thought it was FAMILY FIRST... I thought that is what it always is and I know that it is always like that because we were brought up that way and we were brought up by the same parents. And now this person of interest comes along and you just fucking get irritated because my bus is late and all I asked was to pick me up. The bus did not arrive until 30 minutes after the initial time and you could not even wait for that long because this person of interest is waiting in the car with you.

WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT ABOUT!? Do you know how many times I give up my time that I spend with Graham just to attend to what you asked for or even my friends if I ever get the chance to hang out with them. ALL THE FUCKING TIME!!! Graham gets fed up with it but I reason with him because he took the time to understand that, to me, family comes first no matter what the circumstance and now this happens and you cannot come to just fucking pick me up and bring me home... or even wait for heavens sake. You do not understand how upsetting and disappointed I am with you. This one favour... THIS ONE FUCKING FAVOUR I ask of you and you cannot do it because the person of interest that you have is waiting with you in the car. You could not even wait.. you could not even explain that family comes first to the person of interest or something or anything. Just because the person of interest is in the same car that we drive, you do not want to do this one favour when I have done so many for you in the past. So all the things that I have done, all the time that I gave to do what you ask because I am your sister who loves her brothers very much and this is what you show me.

I have never been so angry and disappointed with you EVER in my life as far as i know. I have never thought that you would just fucking ditch me or just even wait for me. Do you know how much that fucking hurts to know that your own sibling does not have your back when you ask for it when I have always done everything that I could do help you in hopes that maybe one time you would repay it back?! Have you even thought of that... you fucking shit head. I know I will regret all the shit things that I wrote here but I cannot just comprehend in my head alone how this one simple favour of picking me up and bringing me home, you cannot do. It fucking makes me sick to my gut to even realize that I cannot even rely on my brother to hold my hand when I really need it.

Now that I think of it... all the time I gave to attend to you when you needed it is a complete waste. I just cannot figure out how you could just turn around leave me there. I know its a simple task to ask but I still do not understand. Everything is just back and forth and probably blabber that is coming out but I just want to fucking break something to make me feel better or cause some sort of destruction that will release this annoying thing away from me. I hate to rant but I have too... or else it will just be a stupid thing that I left inside of me in hopes that it will just be a lesson.

You are my brother and I still love you but shit man, thats so fucking cold...

`~CheckedOut!

You... who me?

Yes YOU!

Why the fuck would you do that to yourself or even think that way?

Get your shit together!

Fuck!

`~CheckedOut!

It is official...

I am turning into a loner and a stalker, as well as an obsessive person.

Shit.

`~CheckedOut!

I cannot sleep...

I am trying to sleep but I cannot fall asleep; I am going to be sleepless tomorrow.

So many things running through my mind... it is mostly you though.

There are so many decisions that I have to make but I cannot, it is just everywhere that I cannot put them in order.

But I will put your words in use and try it out; I do not know if it will work or not but it is worth a shot.

I miss you already and I love you very much.

`~CheckedOut!

Thoughts

So I am failing this challenge REAL BAD but I will put myself up to date once I get my pictures into the computer. I mean I got them but I just did not have time to post them so I will make it! I promise! Haha!

Another thing... I am very disappointed that I could not claim the top prize when I took part and won the top prize of a hot wing eating contest; 16 wings in total, 4 rounds. It is a really big bummer because it was a $30 or $50 gift certificate from Aramark; basically I would have had $30 or $50 worth of food expenses and I could not get it. Even though I technically got a free lunch today, I still would have liked it if I got the prize. Graham got his... lucky bumm.

I do not know what I am going to do. I have figure things out. What to do? What to do? =/

`~CheckedOut!